The grass usually looks greener on the other side when you refuse to water your own.
If you haven’t figured it out by now, I’m pretty interested in this topic of people traveling abroad to find love and escape the dating drama that may have become common for them in their native countries. According to the articles, blog entries, and videos floating around, black men are hoping to be treated like the Kangs they are in Brazil, white women are seeking boy toys in Turkey, Jamaica, and East Africa, white men have always had their pick of professional masseuses in Asia while a good number of Asian women have left Asian men behind for white men, and black women are being advised to set sail for Europe in search of natural-hair-loving white men who will treat them like Nubian princesses.
My new novel broaches the subject of looking for love away from home, though without the increasingly popular interracial dating component. But there are so many facets to that component that can be explored. These are only a few:
1. The potential stability (or instability) of interracial relationships founded on an assumption that options in one’s own racial group are substandard
2. The fetishization that many people claim to experience when dating outside their race (It seems the men are less likely to complain about this than the women.)
3. The role that prostitution plays in the exploration of “exotic” sexual experiences (Is it wrong or should we give a damn what consenting adults decide to explore?)
4. The unrealistic expectations that sometimes accompany the assumption that men/women from that country are more open to men/women from my country
5. Acceptance of the fact that true love can spring forth abroad and outside one’s racial comfort zone
6. The fact that everybody isn’t looking for a life partner, and that with honesty and realistic expectations, having some fun is okay
As I continue curiously peering into the lives of these Love Travelers I’ve realized that the white guy/black girl thing seems to be trending more and more. While the experiences are certainly varied, many black women are finding themselves quite happy dating and having long-term relationships with white American and European men. What’s up with that?
Fleace Weaver of BlackGirlTravel.com explains the exploration of international and interracial dating in this video:
What do you think? Is setting sail for another country, culture, and set of mentalities the answer, or will humans be humans and essentially, eventually present the same old challenges?